Take no pictures, leave no evidence

So, in response to a request from a friend, I shall try to keep my blog updated yet again. I'm not saying it will be as extensive, funny, or frequent as last year, but I shall try. I dunno, this year has just been more of a "yeah, I'm in Boston, and I'm not thrilled, but it's better." Last year I was crazy homesick. This year, I've learned that my real friends will be there when I visit, and that makes me feel a hell of a lot better.

I'll start this attempt with a re-hash of this weekend. Some of it will go to facebook, some will stay forever here contained for those who already have access and to those whom I will allow to see it. Likely no boys. Unless, ya know, I'm over them or they won't talk.

Thursday:

Travel: Went to property, drug my two (yes two, don't judge) suitcases to class with me then took a van to the airport. It was super easy, and I'm happy I found that mode. Got my requisite Sam Adams and read Cosmo to wile time away before boarding. Flights were super easy. I don't care what you say, I fucking LOVE flying. I may not follow all protocol (I have my MP3 on during take-off and landing), but it's for a good cause (I listen to "You can fly" from Peter Pan during take-off). A little bit of a long layover in Chi-town, but it allows me time for a nice, relaxing dinner. Grabbed Whitey's Ice Cream with the parents when they picked me up. Then just sat around home talking, basically.

Comprehension: Made fun of my brother playing WoW, but I really can't talk. But noone in my family knows I played, and they never will. But ya know, it's kind of nice to not be such an idiot on something my brother is so into. I mean, he'll say "Uldar" and I'll ask "Uldaron?" and he'll look at me like I'm *crazy*, but at least I have a working knowledge.

Friday:

Enemy territory: Visited a friend going to law school at Iowa. Yes, I wore an Iowa State shirt. Had a good chat. It's good now, it's cute that he's asking for advice on what would be good for a first date. (Of course I had to tell him what *most* girls would go for, a cheesy movie and dinner doesn't always cut it.) But to be able to do that and not feel insanely jealous, is good. I liked him for the longest time, and I think I figured out why, but it still feels good to be friends and have another guy to go for advice. Maybe it's not quite to the full extent that BT and W are, but it'll get there.

Pumpkin up the wazoo: Got into Ames and got to the place I was staying. She made pumpkin EVERYTHING that night. Well, maybe not everything, but there was pumpkin everywhere.

The Hangover: Finally saw it. It was hilarious, as everyone said, but I need to buy it/see it again so I can actually use the references. Like "I want a lucky charm to take home with me! However, he need not be naked in my trunk." (The needing to be naked in my trunk is in direct correlation with how hot he is, lol)

Saturday:

The big game: Tried to get a whole shitton of people to go to Welch Ave Station to watch the Iowa State game on Saturday morning. However, I was only able to convince a few (sick, home, sick and home, didn't get the text, at bf's babysitting a kid, washing their hair, etc...) to join. But it was still great. Pizza and beer, what more can you ask for? And honestly catching up with a few people you care about is better than the superficial "Hi, how are you, let's catch up sometime, but I don't really mean that I just want to save face."

Legitimate friends: That's one thing I've learned a lot about this past year. You have a lot of friends, but you only have a few where you can legitimately go away for months, then come back and feel like no time has passed. I love those, and I think this summer found a few more like those. E and J from the previous summer, for sure, and K from this summer. I love it.

So Saturday. After the game with E, J, and K, we left at halftime and K and I went to continue watching some more of the anime movie he started me on this summer. Yes, anime, it's wierd, but it's got enough going on, and enough "What the FUCK?" moments to keep even me entertained. Supper, tried to get more people to go to Zombieland with us, in the end only got A. Yes, only. Finally realized I am over him. If 18 1/2 is the best he thinks he can do, he has no right to try me again, even if he wanted to. But still, a little awkward, between K and A. But fun.

Then BEEER!!! At Olde Main. I'm glad people trust my gut instincts about alcohol. The Oktoberfest from OM was delicious. I don't care whether my taste in beer (darker, but no Guinness) should be switched with a guys, I know what I like, and I like Octoberfests (but no pumpkin, get that whore imposter of a beer out of my face). It got a little interesting. Somewhere in the middle the guys (who were once again joined by E) started playing the Penis game IN THE BAR. I love my guys! The game continued into my car, yelling out the windows toward cops. Fantabulous...

Sunday:

Boring, really. Finally got my cheese things at Cafe Beaudelaire, got a Monty Python Monopoly game after spending 45 minutes at the comic book store. Had my first meal at La Fuente. Yes, I went to Iowa State for 4 years and never went there. I think that deserves an award.

Monday:

Lunch with Kelly. Had a dog chew through my laptop charging cord. Decided I temporarily hate little yippy dogs. Drive home.

All in all a pretty good trip. You learn who actually really wants to see you, or at least get out of their room. I'm starting to hate it a little bit though, because while I'm still very much single, I have the guy that I like at the moment, but because more and more of my friends are getting boyfriends and they are ALWAYS around, it's hard to gossip just a little (I am a girl, after all) around the BF. It's weird. And one friend said she lost herself once during a relationship, and it may be happening again. Hope not, but I felt very pushed to the side for the very small amount of time I was there.

So now, for the overanalysis of le boy:

He'll keep in contact, every once in a while, but no calls. Neither of us really roll that way. But he came out for the ENTIRE day on Saturday. We talked forever, never really ran out of things to say, and when we did, it wasn't awkward. He told me things that I feel... weren't necessary, if you know what I mean. Like, I don't have to know the details of how well or poorly he did his first semester back, it will not make me think any more or less of him. And what he's doing to make himself a better... person? Does dancing make you a better person? He felt bad when I mentioned a guy that had kept in contact with me, by calling, and said he was sorry he hadn't done so (but no calls so far). Little bit of angling during the movie, but we were whispering too, so it made sense. He unwaveringly trusts my judgment in beer. He had never tried the two beers he ordered Saturday, but because I was all for them, even though I even hadn't tried once, he was all for them (and liked them, so I guess it works out). But then as I dropped him off, all he said, was "See you when I see you." WTF?

So there it is. Let me know what you think. Ask about the trip. Whatevs. If you need more info, I'll be happy to provide it.

Grammar people of law school, "untie!"

This was TOO horrible not to post asap.

I'm in law school. You'd think this would mean that the correspondence we receive through the law school would be of a respectable grammatical quality, right?
Nay, nay. For I received this gem this morning whilst I was browsing in class:

Do You Still Need to Purchase a Textbook?
In preparation for next term, we will begin returning unsold textbooks

The Tufts Health Sciences campus Bookstore will start to return unsold New England School of Law textbooks on Thursday October 8, 2009

We know there may be titles not assigned until later in the term or you were holding off on purchasing a recommended title.

Please stop by The Tufts Health Sciences Bookstore or log onto whywaitforooks.com to purchase your textbooks by October 8,2009.

If you have any questions please contact the bookstore team?

Contact your store manager, Nicole Dube at 617-636-**** (To protect the innocent. And believe me, they need it!)

There are at least 3 errors in there.
I don't know why I would want to wait "fo rooks." I don't even know what "rooks" are. Chess?
Then a spacing issue, easy to miss, but I'm not giving them any slack today.
Then..... then... Are they really that confused about whether we should contact the bookstore team if we need help? Do they doubt their qualifications or ability to help us? Does this bookstore team actually exist? What if we choose the wrong answer? We could sit here all day deciding whether we are or are not supposed to actually contact the bookstore team.

May God have mercy on your souls, the "bookstore team?" of Tufts Health Sciences camupus Bookstore, may God have mercy on your grammatical souls.

See photo album

I don't really want to write a big post about last weekend, so in lieu of that, I just really annotated my FB photo album from Philadelphia. So check it out, comment to your heart's desire, etc.

Catch ya on the flip side.

So it continues...

It lives! After nearly 2 months of not posting, I am back. Not that I have a ton to report, but I will type a ton just to be sure I get everything out. THIS post is the one where EVERYTHING comes out, because only people who really want to see it can. Which means... I've deleted the auto-post and the link from FB. Enjoy!

So there I was. In a Starbucks. Next to a Dunkin' Donuts. Which was across from a Starbucks. From which you could see the next Starbucks not half a block away and which was kiddy-corner across a block from the next Starbucks/Dunkin' Donuts conglomerate.
You think I'm making this shit up?! Go back and look at the countdown album from last year. It's sick.

But I suppose I should fill you in on the end of summer. It may wax poetic a bit, but I'm not really sorry for that. This year didn't end as dramatically as last year, but that doesn't mean the summer was any less fantabulous, just a bit less drama-filled. Which was good. This summer was also the summer of putting things in the past. Mostly it was specific guys that I was leaving. HS crush, dude-across-the-hall/fuckface, the best friend and last summer. I won't really go into details, but let's just say that each of them got a demotion, some further down than others.

I wonder if I every filled ya'll in on fuckface. Nope, it appears not. Well, after I unceremoniously rejected his smarmy ass, I saw him around a LOT. A lot a lot. In the hall around K and D's rooms, when we were up LATE playing an unmentionable computer game, invited himself into one of C's parties, etc. He was never asked to not come around, but when he saw I was at the parties, after a few minutes he would leave under some pretense and not come back. Which I wasn't too upset about. The thing that caused the major demotion was one night K, C, A and I were playing foosball downstairs, having a drink or two with it, and he came around with a CHEAP bottle of rum. Drunk as a skunk and apparently high to boot. Really just a general creep-o that night. And I found out later that he stalked one of my friends back to her room to the point that she felt she needed to go to her boyfriend to make him go away. Sorry guys, what hell have I wreaked? But he's gone. Don't know whether he's still in Buchanan, but it's unlikely that I'll have to be down that hall while he's there anyway, or at least down my his room. K's up a floor and C is only half-way down the hall. yay.

Oh, I suppose I'll give you the other 3 guys. After seeing HS crush in the water up to his knees begging, even though he's basically married with a kid on the way, I was able to put him in the past. When A started going after an 18 (and a half) year-old that no-one in our group likes or thinks has any redeeming qualities (not my words, words of a dude, I swear), I realized that if that's all he thinks of himself, I'm better than that. And N. The guy I've like for SO LONG. He stopped by the end of summer and we hung out for a night, and it felt more like I was talking to Will. I was telling him about K, and pictures, and he was saying about he was excited for the high girl-to-guy ratio where he's going to be living this year. I still love him dearly, but I think I may finally be moving on. Probably why I hung on so long was because he was the only one who knew about fuckface. Now many people know and are ecstatic that I kicked him to the curb. One of many theories, I suppose.

But moving on. I've noticed that each summer is kind of defining. With the exception of right after freshman year, each summer has had a theme. After Sr. yr of HS, finishing FFA, 4-H and getting ready for ISU. Soph yr was the lost summer where I learned a lot about how I work and deal. Jr yr was the time I had a job I LOVED, writing for the local paper, and I kicked ass at it too. Sr yr was the stereotypical get drunk/party/rock out, and this was putting things in the past.

But back to this summer. Epic, once again. Made new friends, hung out with the old, didn't have the week-long binges like last year, avoided most boy drama, got a tan, worked out, shot off fireworks...

OK so fireworks deserves it's only paragraph. Got fireworks down in MO, but didn't shoot a ton of them off until the 4th. The 4th my family always goes to the farm of a family friend, to cook out and watch and catch up with lots of people, and of course watch the Grand Mound fireworks. When I was little the guys wouldn't let the girls shoot off fireworks and it was all so controlled. Now, most of the "kids" have grown up so when I showed up with my bag of fireworks, the guys just handed me a propane torch and said "Have fun, we're taking turns!" I love how things have turned out.

...dorked out again. I love hanging out with the kinda dorky guys, what can I say? Why I'm not more into computers or science or own an Xbox is beyond me. We went shooting again... when I finally get a more permanent place, my targets (both paper and the laptop screen) will be up on the wall. Bowling. Bowling was fun. I need to do it more often.

I also picked up on the most random tidbits of information this summer. Some of them good, some of them dorky, and all of them rather interesting. For example:
1. When I am driving, (which won’t be for much longer) I keep thinking on the cloverleaf exits that if I were in a bike race, I would be penalized or kicked out for going over the line. Doesn’t mean it still doesn’t happen.
2. In chats, such as on Facebook or Gmail, I now find myself typing / to start talking, and pressing esc. to make the chatbox go away. I won’t say which game that is from, but it’s a certain often-mentioned, often-dissed (including by me until recently) online game.
3. In relation to the last one, I woke up after a dream about me killing phones to “aquire,” like, the cords or something and to make them stop ringing. However, there was an actual phone ringing in real life… the wake up phone call. Fml.

But I suppose you want to hear about school, eh? It's school, you know how it is... Oh wait, you wanted more? *huff* fine.
T'was a curious drive out to Boston. Eating crap for the last week (Jeff's at 2 am anyone?) I was in Ames then not eating at all because of nerves = no good. It rained a lot. I drove some. Whatevs.

But I'm "moved in" with a fantastic friend from last year. I quote "moved in" because the girl whose room I'm moving into hasn't gotten her stuff out, which I can deal with, but I'm way excited to get it all neat and clean and... it'll be fairly sparse, but I've learned to deal with less for now. I'm not really in the picture-taking mood right now, but I may break that because of wanting to show it off. Like: "See, I can be domestic, just not when people tell me to be, so you can go make your own damn sammich."

The commute's not bad, about 45 minutes, which now that I have my mp3 back up and running with a podcast to catch up on, it should be even better.
The school continues to be FUCKING FREEZING. It was not even September and I already had a fucking sweatshirt in my locker to I wouldn't pop up in goosebumps and more less than 10 minutes into class or during my study marathons in the library.
Class you ask?

Business organizations I have with Finneran, the prof I had for contracts last year. It's pretty boring so far, but she's entertaining enough to keep us awake. I keep calling that class contracts still though, but my friends have learned what I mean.

Land Use is with Bobrowski, also another professor from last year. He seems a lot more into this class than he did property, maybe because we actually want to be there. But the class is going to be a lot about zoning, so I'm going to try to keep the fact that my dad is the, well, County Zoning Administrator back home under wraps. I mean, it'll help me on the paper, but I don't want him thinking I know things, because I don't really. That's right, awesome me, being humble... such an odd moment, I know...

The last class with a professor from last year is Evidence with Hansen. Not bad. Nothing much to report.

Admiralty. Very excited about that class. I know, what's a chick from Iowa doing in a fucking admiralty class? I don't know exactly. It might be to brag, it might be to be weird. Either way, I'm happy.
And the damn writing and research class. I HATE IT. THAT IS ALL.
But I'd forgotten how insanely *tired* law school makes me. And partly it's because I get horrid habits over the summers, staying up til 4, sleeping til 1:30... But all the reading and research now... just makes me more tired.

But the fact that I am amused by the most random things keeps me a little bit more awake. And that my professors are entertaining. Like in evidence, when Hansen said “Every town has a nut, and unfortunately, every nut has rights.” I know ALL about the town yahoos. In Calamus, there was a guy who blogged that a frog had told him to put an anti-psychotic drug in the town watertower because they were all crazy. A frog. And yes, true story. I think he’s in a “facility” now, and all the better, because along with all of that he had a video camera set up in his front door, which was right on main street. Creeper.

Then there’s the lady that tried to tell half of Clinton County that my dad didn’t exist. Pretty sure he does, or I’m also crazy and an immaculate conception. There’s a 13 year age difference from my oldest aunt to my dad, so someone who knows ‘Laina may not have known my dad when they were in school, but he exists, I swear, just got an email from him…

But I feel like this year is going to fly by. It's already the second week of school, and with me already planning Christmas vacation (Ames for at least 2 weeks total, anyone in?) and other things, I certain hope things go fast.

Random tangent alert: Another thing summer does to me is make me lose my handwriting. I work so hard on it over the course of the school year, then I rarely handwrite during the summer. And yes, I am one of the fairly rare breed who always take notes by hand. There will be some exceptions, of course, such as Land Use, where all the cases are online, but otherwise by hand. What can I say? I'm old-fashioned.

In other news, I am a dork. Of the Oddest variety. Why I didn't go into computer or design is beyond me (still). I love the odd guys, casual gamers, and I, as a girl, always feel I must prove my worth against the boys in games. But this next tidbit takes the lego-themed wedding cake.


(ummmm... want?)

I love this song. I was introduced to it mid-summer by K, and every once in a while it'll pop into my head or get sent to me and it's lodged in my head for awhile. But this most recent time I'm glad it happened. It finally got a highly repetitive Ben Folds song that the nearly non-existant 3rd roommate played about 20 times over 2 days. le sigh. I am a dork. But I'm more than ok with it. And December will bring even more nerd-dom. 1 word. BlackAcre.

And there's more to the BlackAcre story, of course. Blackacre is the fictional plot of land that is constantly getting traded when you're talking about property in law. And it will be the name of my new character in WoW. Yes, I play wow, I won't even try to deny it anymore. It was so I would have something to do this summer instead of watching my boys play and be so annoying just sitting and watching over their shoulders. And it doesn't hurt that the guy I currently like, K, is/was big into it. I learn a lot. I apparently like to listen to lectures from guys. First N, now K. Ah well, I am a girl, I suppose.

So all is well on the roaming ctina front. I promise I'll be back in Iowa. I think one of my things making me want to go back so badly is that I'm so fiercely loyal to my friends. I'd not be who I am today without them, so I want to be there for them like I feel they were for me.

So yeah. That's going to be all for now. An edited version will go on FB, but yeah.

All will be well

So I think I finally have this phase of my life over with. After two entire years of hating myself for what I did with fuckface, I have finally talked to him face to face and made peace. Although I think part of this is because I now have the power over him. Which is completely ironic.

So you may or may not have heard about the one-night-stand I had with the guy from my class a couple years ago, where technically I said yes, but it was one of those things that I hated...

But this weekend apparently I grew a pair of large, golden balls that I've needed for the last 2 years. I was planning and attending a frat party, but met up with some friends who later kidnapped me from said party after I returned. By then I was fairly drunk and decided I needed to finally deal with this horrid memory head-on. So I started texting him, telling him we were at Cys. He showed up, and we talked for a bit.

Now please, do not yell at me, because I know that I put myself in this situation. But still. Continuing.

I should have known. I should have gotten the hint while he was trying to take my hand and lead me out of the bar, but I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. Got back to Buchanan eventually, after running into Josh, Andy and Jailbait outside of the frat. I thought I was making it extraordinarily obvious with my body language that I was not going to do anything, sitting backwards on the chair, crossing my arms, etc. But no, he kept pushing and pushing and moving my arms so that he could kiss me and such. He was saying that he actually liked me and was all in, I was cute, etc, but by this point in my life I'm so jaded all I could hear was "Blah blah blah I'm a man whore and I want to get laid tonight." So finally after I forced him off me and grabbed my purse, I got out of there and went home. He kept texting me, telling me to come back and "talk," but no, I stayed away. And in the morning, after waking up and coming to a few more of my senses, I sent a nice (hopefully) text saying something like "I do believe you, but even if you are in it for more, I'm seriously out. Sorry." I don't believe him, but as the one with the power now I felt like I had to be a bit nice.

So yeah. I don't go around trying to gain power over guys, but the two who did have the slight bit I couldn't get rid of, I've taken down in a 1-2 punch the last 2 weekends. I think I can move on now.

But it's still weird. The guy I currently like in the immediate vicinity and I are friends, but there is no way I'm going to put myself out there. But how ironic, that I'm so afraid of rejection that I'm the one doing all the rejecting lately?

All my ex's live in... Iowa. fuck

Where to start? Well, I guess it's safe to say that this post is going to be completely vague and go in lots of circles, and isn't going up til the people who want to know or should know what's going on do. I should also say that due to the very private and secret nature of this one, I've decided to stop importing to Facebook. So if you read this, you are now in a very elite category of people who... actually care!

It all started in November 2007. Got drunk at a tasting at Cyclone Liquors, with a friend, ran into a guy from class, shit went down, I ended up hating what I had done (and you can all reasonably guess that that was, technically I said yes, but I wasn't really ready) and so I stopped calling, stopped answering, I handled it horribly, but the only way I knew how. I knew I wasn't ok, but as long as I avoided the whole situation, I was ok. I even got everything out of my system by venting *everything* to a very close group of friends, so I thought I was progressing.

Then last Monday night. Random guy stopped by my friends room to see what the ruckus was about. It took my about 4 seconds to realize it was fuckface, and only 2 more seconds to retreat to the connecting room and commence freak-out.

I should be over that, I should not have freaked out like that, that was nearly 2 years ago. But that started and ended so badly and abruptly and I was not prepared to see him that I just didn't have time to rationalize my reaction. And now I saw him more in 2 days than I had in a year and a half. And now it sucks, because I have to look down the hall to make sure he isn't there or prepare myself for the first contact. I need to get over it. Not forgive, but move on.

Speaking of moving on. Anybody here go back home for their hometown festivals much? I have been there most years except last year, when I didn't go home from Christmas to August. Then this year. Then this year...

K, or any other members of the SATC group, if you haven't gotten what I will refer to as THE story, stop reading. If you have, then continue, this is just a recap.

You know how we all have that high-school fantasy, the one where you dream that it would come true, but you know it never will? And you also know how at the beginning of a night where you plan to get drunk, you make the joking statements about what you might do or wish would happen? Well, both kinda happened.

My oldest friend S and I were just going to get drunk uptown at the Calamus Days street dance. What else was there to do? We pre-gamed with some strawberry schnapps and lemonade and some Bud Light, which I usually hate, but in cans, was not so bad. Head up town, on the way there, we're talking about where some of the people from HS were and who they were dating and so on... I had a huge crush on a guy back in HS and it was pretty certain that at some point he would be uptown too that night. So I made the joke that "Can I just get drunk and makeout with a [insert last name here] twin?!"

The night wore on, we continued to drink and drink and get rained on and drink and dance and the band was pretty good and we ran into people we had hung out at on the 4th of July and eventually we made our way into the only bar with the rest of the drunks. Ran into another classmate of ours and did some shots, at one point I had both [insert last name here] twins around me and obviously flirting. When we finally got thrown out of the bar, the twin I liked way back (we'll call him... Brian) was standing next to me and rubbing my back and all that, saying that he might be in Ames the next day for a "HVAC seminar". Asked if I wanted to "take a walk," and I said yes, but trying to say, I hope you don't think this is going where I think you think it's going. Down the block he took my hand, and kissed me. Actually fantastic, I have to admit. Made our way to the back of the Fire Station and the LP tank. Lots of standing in water, as the rain had puddled there. Long story short, shirt was off, etc, he definitely tried to get me to sleep with him. I don't want to degrade him at all, but there was begging and sweet talking and I could tell that he still actually wanted me. But I couldn't. This actually goes back to fuckface.

Because I was so incredibly drunk that night, I've made it a rule for myself that the first time with a guy will not be when either of us are drunk, and "Brian" and I were smashed. I tried to tell him that, and if things had been different, it might have happened. But not then. I hated myself for fuckface, and I didn't want to hate myself for "Brian".

But I'm leaving the best part for last, and yes, I knew this the whole time, and factored in to my decision slightly. He has a, ah, very long-term, live-in relationship. She has at least 2 kids, not by "Brian", but she now has one on the way that she says is his. He says he doesn't quite trust her, but yeah. So I made out with him. I didn't let him cheat. And it's complicated... oh so complicated...

But moving on, even with the title of the post... Last summer's psuedo-ex. Has a new lady friend. Who is 18... and a half. Like, she introduces herself as that. I'm sorry, but if you feel the need to introduce yourself in half years, you're just not quite ready to level up yet. But this has had the happy coincidence of ruining any chance he had or wanted with me.

Which probably happened awhile ago anyway. But the reason I know now is because I certainly have my sights set on another. And this time, finally again, for the first time since "Brian", a guy I like is actually older than me. And this time, by quite a bit. I don't want to get into it quite yet, one, because I don't know where I'll be in a month, and two, because I don't want for it to seem like it's retaliatory for the 18 1/2 year old. But it's fun, we've become grand friends. And what's it mean when you catch him just looking up at you for extended periods of time? huh, another question for another night, I suppose. Because this post is already far too long.

g'night!

Tired of my hair color

Guys, if you read this, you will be bored shitless. Except for the end. Near the picture. Skip to there. Don't say I didn't warn you...

Yup, you guessed it. I dyed it again. Now normally, this is just something I do every once in a while, ya know, to change up the everyday. But in this last one, I think I may have realized something.

Each time I go to dye it, it's at the start of something new. Whether it's a new semester, a new school year, or I'm just wanting to make a good impression, I dye it for occasions. Starting my junior year of college. I mean, I did it in high school when I was trying to change my image a little, but I stopped. I've always gone red. Well, the first time wasn't my choice, but I still ended up loving it. It was for a conference where we had costumes. Our school's theme was X-Men, and I was Jean Grey. Red hair. Bright red hair. So that was really the start of my time in Res Hall government. The *start*. Then beginnings of semesters, like with Dirk Deam and I felt different hair would make me more confident. Not so much, but yeah. Beginnings. I held off on it in the fall semester because I hated where I was. I think I finally dyed it when I accepted that I was stuck there for the year. Then, for Spring Break. that was a stupid reason to dye it, but none-the-less. Things were going to change one way or the other and I knew it. Now, they changed for *the other,* but still.

So this last time. I must really be wanting to make changes. Well, I've already changed one thing about my life, and I think I'm finally accepting things. That and one of my friend got me on this kick and now I going to try to reach that goal, and going for dark hair is one step closer. And dark. Not red/brown/auburn. Brown. Love it. But, off the tanget, I dye it when things are new, or when I think things are going to change. And right now, I kind of like this change. Or maybe I'm just being a girl and I will have a completely different mindset next week. I hope not. Unless action is taken, I don't think it will be different. Besides, I know what (who?) I want, so I shouldn't worry about others. Although this may be a try to differentiate myself from others. I've known that part for awhile. But on the other side, I was just tired of being a dirty blonde. There are too many of those around. The only thing is that I really need to tan for it to look good.

So yeah. Told you boys (if you actually got to this point) it would be boring. Girls and their hair, very personal.

In other news, (not very interesting news) I'm jacking up my work out. In 2 days I upped my total time by 2/3. Now instead of 3 sets of 8 minutes on eliptical with a set of 20/10/20/20/10 in between, now it's 5 sets of 8 with the same after. Woohoo. I can feel it. After the second day of ramping, I HURT, but I'm better. Musculosos I never knew existed are coming through, which is awesome...

Uhm... yeah. Saw Transformers at the midnight showing! Awesome!!! I want to see it in IMAX now, but no-one wants to go with me... sad day.

The pits are now warm enough for daily swimming!!!

Went shooting with one of my friends the other day. AR-15. Did pretty well. The first two times I got all my shots on the target!!! Couldn't tell after that because of sharing, but it's going up on my wall...



Soo tired now. Going to bed.

Another day, another pint night

I feel as though I should update this, but I'm unsure as to what to go off on. No real rants. I'm pretty content with how things are going right now, I suppose.

Hmmm... We went and got fireworks. Road-trippin' it. It was a lot of fun, actually. Just me and a few guys. That day ended up being next to perfect. After getting home, we went swimming out at the Pits, shot off a few fireworks, had hotdogs and s'mores over a fire, so so perfect. I wish I could keep days like that in my pocket and hit "replay" when I have a sucky day. Like last night.

(K, if we have not hung out when you go to read this, stop, because I really want to have storytime with you)

Before I begin, I should say that I have been sick the past couple of days. So I've been loading up and doubling up on cold medicine. Which I knew would probably affect my ability to keep up my normal level of drinking, even after not drinking for a few days. Little did I know. Little did I know.

Went to Olde Main with A, T, T's friend, M and J. After one drink, I was pleasantly tipsy. After two drinks, I was a bit drunk and should have stopped there. After 3 drinks I was drunk, after 4 drinks, I was blitzed beyond belief. I remember nearly everything, bits of it are coming back a little bit hazily, but for the most part it's there. But I was horrid! I was doing things I never would have imagined I would do, even drunk. I know I get in a "let's tease people and freak them out and pretend to stop breathing and hide" mood when I'm drunk but what the fuck I was an annoying sonofabitch!! And I was talking and sharing and Hell, he nearly got the *fuckface* story. Very few people know that story, it's not a pretty one. It needs to be told at some point, (along with the fun stories of my ex's and psuedo-ex's(Oh, that's the fun one!)) but a controlled, non-drunk environment for goodness sake! And now I may have screwed things up there, because God knows things went to hell and back once. Meh, at least I didn't take my top off. But I did have an interesting run-in with an officer as I was crossing the street to my apartment...

But after nursing my slight hangover, I finally got back on the horse (and by horse, I refer to the elliptical and weights) and did my full workout again, after doing a half-assed one Monday because I could feel the cold coming on, and skipping Tuesday and Wednesday because I was sick. So that felt good. And swimming tonight, and I finally have food again because I got back to Fareway...

And, and. Guitar. I hate to brag, but I'm getting good. Now I have a lot of time to practice, I don't have work a lot, but still. Taylor Swift and Plain White T's are my staples for now, but I have a lot of the chords down. Now I just need to convince my friends who *really* play guitar to take me under their wing and teach me a few tricks.

OH. And yeah. Twitter. Yes, I'm on Twitter. I got it to stay in touch with a friend when I moved to Boston and my following is still not very large. But massive confusion ensued recently. I started talking to this friend who is still in Ames for the summer at least. Then this guy whose avatar looks a lot like said friend started following me. I thought it was said friend. So I start going back and forth with the @ replies to him and direct messages. Then, yesterday, thinking I was talking to said friend, started talking him into dollar pint night at Olde Main. Apparently, this was not said friend. I don't know who it is. But we're still going back and forth after I apologized and said I thought he was someone else. It seems he saw me at pint night but I was pre-occupied (what with the being blitzed off my ass and having my bra flicked) so he didn't come over, but he would still want to actually meet me. I am conflicted. Another time, another pint night, I suppose.

But I'm getting antsy. I know why, and it's not a good why. But it's the why every girl gets in the summer. But we'll see.

My guitar is on fire.... not really

This post is going to be fairly short, and fairly trivial. More about going ons than rants or anything. I'm quite boring as of late.

I just got a guitar. And JUST got. This is late Wednesday afternoon. I got it at about 1:30 this afternoon. I've practiced and napped. That's all I've done. It's a solid mahogany-top acoustic Alvarez folk guitar, and it is gorgeous. It's not your typical guitar color, it's much richer, darker color, and it's pretty. It sounds gorgeous too. When I heard mahogany makes guitars mellower, I wasn't sure about that, but it sounds amazing, to me at least. I don't have any pictures of it yet, but I will soon. I even just about have a name for it. I thought it fits, and I think it still does, but I'll take suggestions.

So ah, this whole work out thing. I like it. It's not like I don't have proper motivation, it feels good, even though it does hurt. Some mornings my body hates me. Like *really* hates me. Well, it's more of throughout the day it hates me. Like Monday. After not working out really all weekend, except for golf on Sunday, I woke up late (10:30, when I was intending to already *be* in the workout room) and so I pushed it to get there asap. So the whole day I was tired and sore. It was like "You stupid whore! You get me up and push me for an hour right out of bed? When your *aunt* is visiting?! Then you expect me to *like* it? You stupid whore!!"

And in other, even more recent news, the oven in our apartment set on fire during a self-cleaning cycle. Luckily we were all in the apartment at the time, and got the fire extinguisher out and everything.

Also, a few other things have made me very happy in the last couple of days, and you can ask me about them if you want, and I'll tell you, but vague-girl returns!

Not all silences have to be awkward

Oh this one will be fun. To write, at least, maybe not to read.

But apparently my tweets and posts have been so completely cryptic that my best friends can't figure them out. Which is great. I love dropping hints, but not saying anything outright until I figure out what is going on. But to K, I say, I promise, I will fill you in on Saturday. And to D, well, you were way off, and eventually, as I said when I figure it out, you will know what I meant. But not yet.

So to continue with my commentary on my drunken life...

In the past 8 nights, I have only not had a drink on two of them. Let's see, the last blog seemingly ended on the recap of Wednesday so... Thursday, I think, it was either Thursday or Friday that I just stayed at home with J, went to Welch Ave Station with D, B, K, and K. Ended up chatting with I, then KC stopped in before heading out of state for the summer. Was made to try a Zombie, lots of rum, not much else. Saturday, T, K2 and S came over, then W and C came, we played drinking games, they spent the night.

About C. I really don't know what to think. I've really waffled about whether I wanted to meet her or not. But I kinda had no choice. It was fine. We got along, which was a little different from the random dreams I've had where I've called her really-not-so-flattering terms, it was fun, W got "a little drunk," and we had fun. Best friends anytime soon? I think not. But able to co-exist within the same room without having the space-time continuum explode? Yes, that is possible.

T is teaching me guitar... well, letting me play his prized electric guitar at least. I wanna be able to bust out some Bo Burnham songs pretty soon. Nothing fancy. Just some chords. Baked cakes, went to S and C's to hang a bit, then to WAS. THREE TIMES that night. I got waved in twice. I think this is a new record. I've only been back for a week and I'm already getting waved in by the new ID takers, awesome!!!

Birthday party Monday. Chill, get burned by the sun a little. Tuesday, got stuck at Buchanan for a few hours because of the rain before I just said screw it and walked home. You know the intersection just outside of Element? Yeah, knee deep. I could have swum home and been less soaked.

I don't really know what to say. The days are kind of blending together. Which is nice, but really disconcerting at the same time. When I was at school, I'd know the specific date and day, and I knew what I would be doing. Now, I couldn't tell the date without a computer or calendar. Ok, it's the 27th. Good, Now I know.

Also, I want it to be sunny again. I want to go swimming and tanning and it's just been cold and rainy and not conducive to either. I tan really, really well, and I haven't had time or the incentive to tan in so long. I think I just want to prove I still can. I like being pale, but I'm ready for a change.

I've noticed a phenomenon lately, and I'm trying not to become a part of it. Really trying. How people fall back into things they said they wouldn't, or start things they said they would never do. This seems so weak to me. Come on, if you make a decision, you have to stick with it, not just go for the instant gratification. If you say no to someone, you should really take time, not just wait for them to give you puppy dog eyes. Wait for them to grow up, not just until they realize they want to get laid again.

Teehee, more crypticness. Nothing more of meaning to say.

Ames, sweet, home

I've been working toward this post for a very long time, and I don't know exactly how to begin.

I'm back in Ames, and I could *not* be happier. So far I've seen nearly everyone I've wanted to, and I'm sure the others are soon to come.
But I'll start at the beginning.

The drive from Boston was long, but good. I needed something completely mindless to help get over the past month of law school studies. I drove all the way through New York and from Cleveland all the way home to Calamus.
Got some unpacking and repacking done at home. Haircut, etc. Then got out to Ames on Tuesday. Got everything moved in in about 2 hours and everything organized and put away by the next day. Win

Tuesday night was great. Went out with the 2 Ks for dinner and beer and crepes (or creeps, as we eventually referred to them as) and talked and had a great time. After that, met up with M and some friends and headed to Welch Ave Station.

Next day, went to the beach with M, J and S, so twice, yeah, but so fun. I might have gotten a bit burnt, but so worth it to relax on the beach like that. I can't wait til the water is warm enough to go swimming in.

Went to visit D in Buchanan. Planned the night at Olde Main. They said there would be random people there, but none of that could have prepared me for that.
Got there, was part of a beer down before a group of about 15 or more showed up with D. I was overwhelmed for a bit, but then settled in and had a rock-awesome night. Great beer, new friends... I won't say much here, because that might give something away. But I had a great talk with I, he had some good things to say, even though I already had my suspicions. And if you think this is about you, it likely is, but ah, until you tell my anything at all, I'm gonna go of what other people say, because it's all I'm getting at this point.

I also have some ass-kicking to do. It's going to be awesome.

So I met some great new people, and I think it's going to be a great summer so far. People have said they miss me, which is great. And ya know, things could get interesting too, which I'm looking forward to.

That's that, with regards to Ames so far. Very boring, but a bit of an update at least. The following is just a rant.

So I saw this bumper sticker. It said, "When 2006 is grown and gone, 2007 will party on and 2008 will think they're cool but 2009 will always rule." I beg to fucking differ. These kids... are just kids. I know I really shouldn't be talking, but I feel that as a proud 2004 HS grad, that these kids have no idea what they're in for. We've paved the way, we've rocked it out, and we're going to make hell for them. Break a few hearts, face a few hard times, see your friends fall and rise, go balls to the wall and not see your results, love and lose, have fun and rise above it all... then we'll talk.
Kids.
Yes, I know I'm friends with some of these kids, and I wouldn't trade some of them for the life of me, but some need to grow up. Open up. Man up. Etc. You get my vibe.

More later, I'm feeling lame now.

WOOOOHHOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!

That was playing over and over and over on the Wednesday before the final!!!

Now the last final is over and I can forget about the tests for about 3 entire weeks.
I suppose I forgot to mention some of the things about the contracts exam. Now that I remember them, at least.
I did, in fact, use "My internal thesaurus is broken," on the test. I fixed it later, but the quote remained.

But now. I'm done. For 3 months.
I'm still in shock and I'll admit, still quite drunk from the afternoon at Sidebar with the rest of the gang. I'm a little bit more of a lightweight than I came into law school as. I had 1, 3 beers, plus one plus two modifications of the specials.... 6-ish drinks and I'm quite gone. I'll remember all of it, and it was great to talk drunkenly and, well, some interesting things with the other drunken guys at the bar, but I'm ready to get back home. Everybody is so encouraging and excited for everybody, whether they want to transfer or not.

(I had a very ranting paragraph right here, but since I've done some investigating, I'll leave it out til I have more proof of possible... whatever they may have done. Wanna see it? Tell me, I'll send it to you. It's very cryptic, you won't get much out of it, I'm telling you. It was just one of my signature rants.)

So yeah. A kind of short post. Once I find my camera cord, I'll post pictures on fb. And if you're not friends on fb, you really probably shouldn't be reading this, so fuck off.

1L YEAR IS DONE!!!!!

Unfortunately Lawrence v Texas made what the school is doing to us legal

I wish I weren't so tweaked out on school and caffeine. I can have coffee every once in a while, but I get all twitchy. I kinda want some now though, now that you mention it... hm... starbucks....

So Contracts was today.
Yup.
I think I did ok on the essay. But on the multiple choice... I could have shit on my test and maybe gotten more right. I hadn't even heard of one of the words on there. Ridiculous. So yeah. I'm completely exhausted right now, but I need to do laundry and finish packing. I really can't wait to go, but I still have crim between me and freedom.

Don't look at me like that. Haven't you ever seen a chick do pilates in a library before? Yep, I've taken to doing stretches and random ab mini-workouts for study breaks. Gets the blood flowing well. I really don't care if I'm "that friend." You would lie on the floor and do stretches too if you were in the same position with nowhere to go for weeks on end, with no weekend breaks...

And it occurs to me that while I don't think I've changed, I've gone through a lot of ups and downs in the last 9 months. Well, I'm not sure ups and downs is the right term, but something like, becoming unsure of myself, designing my life around what other people were doing or thinking in relation to mine... I have notes on my finals study material from contracts last semester that reminds me of what a silly girl I was being back then. But the bitch is back, and I'm taking no shit. I don't care if I'm "that friend," the one who goes a half-hour out of her way just to get free beer, the one who will put the guys in their place, especially when they deserve it, the one who will lie on the library floor and do pilates, the one who will flip from classic rock to Bo Burnham in the same 15-minute time period, the one who will shoot a gun and show up all the guys, and the one who would rather talk shit with guys than drama it up with chicks (although it does seem to find me).

On a similar tone, there are so many inanimate things I would rather marry instead of a guy right now. Like, Pandora. My Caramel Latte. A piano. Monty. Don't judge.

I did a *ton* of packing on Friday night. I'm so proud of myself. Lots of vacuuming, lots of labeling, but I think I'm getting everything in the right place for this summer. Very stoked. But how everything is going to fit in the van is another question. I suppose once the shelf is taken down, it'll look a bit like less, but until then, my stomach does flops.

Oh, and apparently my body is anticipating the change that is about to come. Usually, after a big-ish change, I won't eat much for about a week. Like, moving back to school school sophomore year, moving to Buchanan, moving to Boston last fall AND coming back after Christmas break. Anytime I'm uncertain about anything. But I'm going into that mode *now*, as opposed to after I move. Very odd. I mean, I'm excited, I know I'll have friends there, but there are still things I'm worrying about. I mean, I'm at peace with the whole flaming disaster that was Spring Break, but I'm still anxious to see how the dynamic is. I don't know where I'm working yet, and I'm not sure which place I would prefer at the moment. I don't know how I"m doing on finals and whether I'll be able to stay in Iowa, as I'd like. I'll be losing my best friend and I *really* won't know when I'll see him again this time around.

I would like to revisit a procrastination "website" I probably talked about during finals last semester, but this time there's new material. The Angry Video Game Nerd. Still hilarious.

"If I were walking walking through the mall and I saw giant bouncing donuts and killer marshmallows, walking shoes and spring-jumping shoes, moon-walking shoes, paperbags with legs, paperbags with scary-fucking heads and killer towels, I think I'd shit my pants."

Random thoughts:

Apparently I can pull off pale. Who knew. I was always the one who could tan well without even trying. Now I find out that I *really* don't need to try. Wow. Go me.

Oh HEEELLLL no. They just gave an honorary degree to someone who can barely speak English!

You know, you can always tell it's been a long day when you go back to the house, whip off your pants and chug water.

The Final Week Starts

So I've decided to post after each exam. A rather arbitrary assignment of a task, but still, a set time.

This morning was property. And I gotta say, if there ever was a pleasant mind-rape, that was it. I have no idea how I did, but I finished with plenty of time, I don't feel anxious like I do about con law or Civ Pro, and I can honestly just leave this one in the past. No lying awake until 2:30 wondering how many points will be taken off for missing that issue.... not fun. But even with all that, I still feel like cuddling with my Federal Rules book. It might *actually* be the first long term relationship I've had in a while. I'm kinda hard to tie down, have you noticed? And I know, maybe not in terms of geography, but yeah, in the other sense. Grrrrr.... I don't know where I'm going with this so I'm just going to continue with my story.

So as we were walking to lunch I was a complete dork and was like, "In exactly 168 hours we will be done with finals!" Yeah, Dr. Waggoner from Soc made me appreciate the length of a week. Well, maybe not appreciate, I procrastinated back then too, I was writing frantically late into the night before that 401 paper was due. But at least I know how long a week is!...

So yeah. In my studies, I came across this paragraph I found amusing while I was reading back when it was assigned. Background is that apparently a guy was doing a title search on a piece of property, and the guy who was buying wanted the search to go further. Yeah, the lawyer was a dork and kind of a douche, but I want to be them:

Gentlemen:
I am in receipt of your letter of the fifth of this month inquiring as to the state of the title prior to the year 1803
Please be advised that in the year 1803 the United States of America acquired the Territory of Louisiana from the Republic of France by purchase. The Republic of France previously acquired title from the Spanish Crown by conquest. Spain acquired title by virtue of the discoveries of one Christopher Columbus, a Genoese sailor who had been duly authorized to embark upon his voyage by Isabella, Queen of Spain. Before granting such authority, Isabella, a pious and cautious woman, obtained the sanction of His Holiness, the Pope. The Pope is the Vicar on earth of Jesus Christ, the only son and heir apparent of God. God made Louisiana.

My next final is on Monday. Contracts. The first final that isn't open note or some sort of open book.
I don't have a lot to say this time. So yeah. Uhm... Less than 2 weeks til Ames?

*sigh* Some boys are just pretty to look at...

But finals leaves no time for that.
Eeebadeepaadeepbeeed. Ever feel like this? I just got out of my Civ Pro final. And I feel like I've been run over by a 747. Without the landing gear, and with spikes. I'm so physically exhausted and tired, and I did NOT have a monstrous headache when I went in, and *now*? Well, I've taken enough various painkillers to kill a smalll village, but hopefully it won't kill *me*.

But, guess what. I only have one more Sunday in Boston!!! Yet the end of finals seems like forEVER from now. But we're gonna go with optimistic.

More things I've learned in law school:

Come finals, many things are given up. A social life, for example. Sleep and hydration, however, somehow become vitally important.
Sometimes an exasperated sigh can say more than words ever could.
Just when you need to the most, you cannot for your own life read your own handwriting. (although, in my own defense, I know what reconnoitering means, I really don't use it in everyday conversation)
Finals, while for studying, has kind of made my entire life flash before my eyes. Who matters, who doesn't, and why things happen. How existential of me. (I swear I'm not emo, I just play one on TV sometimes.)
Everything from first semester (that's not used this semester) is GONE. I saw the words, respondeat superior and had *no idea* what they meant and thought I had a whole concept I had forgotten in Civ Pro and would have to learn again from the beginning before the test tomorrow. *headdesk*

Ugh! Right in the baby-maker. The school has the turnstyles you have to card in each time you go in the library, and every once in a while I move forward before it registers my card. It hurts. That is all.

And the title of this one? Actually true. There are just a couple guys in our class that are gorgeous, and while I rarely talk to them, and don't even study in the same room as them, it makes me happy when I see them.

And with the guys anyway, what is with it with guys picking up girls on the subway. I went on that one date with the guy I met last semester (we still hang out, whatevs) and tonight, I'm pretty sure this other guy would have asked me out or asked me to join if I had shown *any* interest in watching the Celtics game. Sorry dude, finals, and I really don't care. I literally asked, "What game?" We talked for a bit, so yeah. What's up with that?

And oh. dear. God. What is with the crazy porno spam I get in my gmail spambox? I don't even know where the random generators come up with this crap. I know I've gone on this rant before, but still, I highly doubt that increasing "sexuall" desire in women is for the "exercise of the deer." Unfortunately I've just emptied my spambox yesterday or you'd get some extraordinarily great tangent.

I have determined the perfect day will happen once I'm back in Ames. Ask if you want to know what it involves, or want in, but oh yes, there will be.... love.

One final note: I can't wait until "See you tomorrow" doesn't mean, "I'll see you tomorrow because I can only study at the library too. And I have to study if I want to stay in law school. Hence, I'll see you tomorrow."

Cousins need to stop f**king

Well hello world. It's been awhile since we've last met. Not much to report though, but I'll try to make it entertaining.

We had our first test on Thursday. Constitutional law. I wish her good luck in grading them, I really do. Mine should be interesting, I'm pretty sure it'll look like I have multiple personality disorder or something, my handwriting goes from neat printing to cursive and back from sentence to sentence and sometimes even from word to word. And it gets messier as time goes on, obviously. *And* I used some interesting analogies, that's one of the few things I remember, contrary to statements to be made later in this post. I actually used an argument reminiscent of this story in arguing about regulations the government could use to protect genetic diversity. Yeah, I'm going nuts, it's ok, so far it's a fun trip.

Glad to get it out of the way, but it's very odd. I'm not sure that I could really tell you what was on the test, much less what I put down. I have this image in my head of what law exams actually feel like. All the material and reading and classes all spiraling in toward a concentrated point in time, and then the point in time poops you out, dazed and confused, and the spiral starts anew. And at the end there's a very large tub of alcohol. I'll try to illustrate that at some point.

I think I'll try to start a list of things I've learned in law school thus far. They may or may not be useful. We'll see:

How to spell attorney.
How to spell judgment.
Coffee is like beer, it's an acquired taste, and the more you drink it, the more you can tolerate it.
My internal clock is easily adjusted by a simple change in sleep schedule, but one late night and it's hell to pay.

One final note: I can't wait to get back to Ames. I want to be able to play piano. All this just listening to music is kind of killing me. I want to be able to pound out a Mannheim Steamroller or Trans-siberian Orchestra or some other music on the piano and actually feel the music. I miss that. A lot. I didn't know how much until lately.

I also want to learn guitar, but that will take the coercion of one of my summer boys. Tomjack, this means you, if you didn't know, or are actually reading this.

Finals Trials

I think Erie needs to go off and die in a ditch where rabid badgers would thus devour it. I think it just gave me an aneurysm. Or is that the nagging bit of Con Law at the back of my head? Yep, that's right, thanks to Con Law I also think due process (of any kind) needs to go jump off a cliff. Except for the whole abortion thing. Choice is still good there. Just sayin'.

I really don't want to study for con law. I used to love it. I had my great debates with Tim and Nick and Neal, and I miss that. Now, we hate our professor, hate the class, and hate our lives because of it. During the review she said she "Didn't want to re-teach us" con law right then. Which means that she thinks at some point she taught us something. She is sadly mistaken. Grrrrr! At least that test is first up on Thursday, and I've got a reservation to the Sam Adams open house that night.

Is there any worse feeling in the world than during finals and a message comes up saying, "Word is unable to open this document due to an unknown error. You may try to recover it by praying to the bag of potato chips on the bottom shelf at the 7-11. No, not the one across the street, the one across town. The one you've never been to. Now, once you're done with that. Go to the middle of the Zaikim bridge. There will be a man in a pink Fedora and he will give you the password to a chest that is buried on Lovell island, which you must wait until May to go to, because the ferries conveniently don't run until May. No I don't care that your exam for this class is on May 7, that's not my problem. The chest will contain the code to unlock your lost outline, but it will not be in outline format anymore, just a list of meaningless words and code. Hey, Word said it would get it back, it made no promises on format. To get format you go to City Hall."
FML

I've also noticed that finals had started to reduce my ability and desire to think very complexly outside of studying. My conversations have started going downhill. I think I'm on about an 8-year-old level, with some teen-age girl "likes" thrown in there for good measure.
I saw the phrase "yudu screenprinter" and read it as "Yoda sphincter" until I realized that made sense in no universe.
Wore a Cyclone Alley shirt Saturday, wanted to show some Iowa pride. Walked to school, etc.
Went to Starbucks to get a drink, order, hand the barrista the cash, and she asks, "So are you *from* Iowa?"
I start freaking out in my head, because I'm thinking, "I just handed her cash, there's no way she should know, and even if I gave her my debit card there's no way to tell it's from Iowa..."
Then I remember.
The shirt.
Duh.
I've also apparently gotten even more ignorant to current events than usual. Who's president again? And what's with this swine flu? Is that an actual thing or just a twitter meme?

It also seems like my parents are having retro-active control issues. I was very unworthy of control during the times I actually lived at home, I didn't go out with the bad crowd, I dated the good guys, I got good grades, I followed the rules. So they didn't really have to exert any power, I was never grounded (though that part might have had something to do with the fact I was involved in EVERYTHING and they wouldn't keep me away from school activities). But now they're trying to make me feel bad for having my own life and not staying at home longer. Wake-up call, I have my own friends and my life is no longer there. I'll always call it home-home, but even they admit things get tense after awhile, so they need to stop being so passive-aggressive when I try to make plans to move to Ames. It's pissing me off. I want my Ames life back.

On a happier note, I may go ahead and get some sort of civil (haha, very punny... you'll see why in a minute) union to my civil procedure book.(ba-dum-bum. thank you thank you I'll be here all week)(oh dear lord kill me now! I'm making civ pro jokes. At least property jokes can be sexy! "I'll take *you* by adverse possession!" omg *headdesk*) We're allowed to "annotate" it, which our professor even took the liberty to tell us we can outline in it. So I've taken the last few days to do that. It's really amazing how neat your handwriting can get when your grade and/or life may depend up it. It's gorgeous, and I think I know my stuff, and I'm just going to hold it and love it and cuddle it next Sunday night.

Also, along with stress apparently comes very loverly and vivid dreams. Now if only the events would actually come true. :-) <3

But, it's getting toward bed-time. So far this week I've gotten about 18 hours in studying, and that's only going to grow. I've never studied harder in my life.

I wonder if, for the purpose of finals, a kiss could be considered a contract?

So Facebook just recommended that I "become a fan" of "Left 4 Dead." This confuses me. Nowhere in my interests does it state that I in any way enjoy video games (although I do have that horny engineer quote...). But still, it makes me wonder, am I friends with too many gamer dorks? (nah... gotta love em all...:-) )

I know, I know, I've been not posting every two days, as is my late norm, but I have to tell you, not much has been happening. Finals period is starting up, as I guess was the title of the last post, as I recall, so yeah, still going on. I have to say though, and this is going to make me sound like a complete and utter ditz and blonde, but this studying thing may have something to it. I mean, I was pretty good at school, so I never really worried about studying, and I did just enough to get decent grades at ISU, but this really studying, making outlines, doing practice quesions, it just might help. Case in point: I was doing a practice question for Criminal law the other day, and that night, when I was trying to fall asleep, the rules of murder kept going through my head. In not a creepy way, let me assure you, but it made a light go on, like: "Hey, I remember what I studied...wait..." So yeah, I'm a ditz, but I'm going to do better in finals this time around, I'm sure of it. Except for con law, which the review session today made me want to sit in a corner and rock back and forth. We'll see about that one. At least it's first.

Let me give you an example of the craziness we have to study:

You tell me, does this sentence make any sense to you?

"Feoffment with livery of seisen."

No?
Didn't think so.
Oh, what? You thought I was going to explain it? Haha, nice try.

Also, this is frustrating. The further I get on my outlines, the further I get from the end. You know what I mean. When you have to go back and review something, except you keep adding to it, so the more work you put into it, the longer it gets, so the further from the end you get. So instead of you being on page 14 of 25, you're now on page 16 of 32. Your contributions have not helped the situation except to make it seem more futile.

I did go shopping on Thursday though. I had to get out of the school after Civ Pro review, my head was spinning. So I went to this super-fun store called, actually, Funusual. They've got tons of cute and unusual stuff. I got some cookie cutters of gingerbread men with pieces "bitten" off, something I've been stalking the store for for months. Also some stuff for K's birthday, some "I <3 my penis" and other random packs of gum (I figure they'll be fun to unsettle the guys this summer), and the thing I'm really excited about, but embarrassed too... penguin salt and pepper shakers. I'm odd, I don't really care, but still.

Which brings me to my next point. I have learned, and you've probably seen it asserted here, that I'm learning to not worry about what people care so much about me. If they don't like me, that's their problem, not mine. And so I've become completely comfortable being "that friend" in a group. Not the "let's leave her behind" friend, that still pisses me off, and believe me, if you make me disposable, I make you disposable. But the quirky, odd, makes people laugh and is always up for something silly and crazy. That's me. I like it.

So as I'm getting closer to the end, I realize it's only 21 days til I will be OUT of Massachusetts!!! I'm not gonna lie, I will miss the friends I've made here, and I hope they'll still be here for me if for some reason I end up not being able to transfer, but I'm super excited to go home as well. And while home is now Ames, I now have a picture of my home home as my wallpaper to remind me:





Oh, my parents did end up buying that condo out in Arizona.

I will leave you with a thought I found somewhere (I honestly don't remember where) and thought, "yes." I think I would feel this way too.

"Today when my toast was done it popped all the way out of the toaster and I caught it midair and a little part of my soul that I didn’t know was empty suddenly became filled."

So starts finals period

So if you all haven't figured it out yet, I only use the phrase "I'm out" when I'm actually pissed or need to get over something. So yes, this weekend's "I'm out til VEISHEA's over" status... yes, I was sore over it. Fuck it. Hopefully I'll be back next year. And actually, I'm still not on FB, this is from an external blog. So ha.

Ok, so I do use "I'm out" in other situations, but unless I'm *actually* *leaving*, there's a good chance I'm using in angry irony. Take note.

So starts finals period.
I tried to get out of the school to study, so I went to the Boston Public Library. It looked like a nice building, and the website touted it as a wonderfully artistic place to study. But the security guards came after me and my coffee, and in one of the more sketchy places I've been lately, there was an empty hip-flask of bottom-shelf vodka sitting on one of the tables. So I got out of that area. Found the study room I saw on the website, and am getting some decent work done. I think. But I think I need to alter my sleep schedule.
That and my roommates need to shut the fuck up.

So in preparing my outline for Civ Pro, I have run across another of our esteemed professor's unintelligible scriblings on the slides. I'm not sure it's quite that important this time around, but still, I probably should be able to come up with something to translate it to and... nothing. Well, fvpen or foopah (come on people, urban dictionary it), which, I can **guarantee** you Sorenson would never write. Or even think. Yeah. Thoughts?:



I've started to notice that we've started referring to the end of finals like I imagine the Pilgrims would have referred to the end of their voyage. Like, "I'll see the light of day and be normal when finals are over," and "Some of us may fall along the way, but if we make it to the end there will be a bright light, filled with booze and loud music." Or maybe that last one is just me.

Maybe this is an example: OMG I miss driving!!! In less than a month I get to drive for about 16 hours!!! Then 3 more, and all around Ames!!! I miss Monty, even if his backseat does smell of booze.

This will completely be my status on the day of the last final here:

"So until our tears are dried, we'll drink and drink and drink and drink and then we'll drink some more. We'll dance and sing and fight until the early morning light, then we'll throw up, pass out, wake up, and then go drinking once again!"

Anyone recognize it? It's yet another gem from my Tenacious D radio on Pandora.

Some people are really going nuts with the studying already. Yes, I've actually started buckling down, but there are people who say they don't sleep at night and study from like 7 in the morning until 11 at night, and I just can't see it. I mean, I'm sure they don't and can't study straight through, but I can't even pretend to study that long or that hard. I need to have some semblance of a normal life. Besides, it's impossible for someone to be productive for every single waking minute. You just can't do it. You'll go nuts. I hope to emerge both victorious and sane at the end of finals. Wish me luck

*Cue non-sequitur segue*

Be very glad I have a very strong force pulling me back from doing many of the impulses I would love to do. It's very good that I don't put my evil to actual use. If I were ever employed to put my evil schemes to work, the world would come burning down within weeks. Those people who have pissed me off should be particularly glad I have this certain over-ride mechanism.

One last note: It appears as though my parents have made an offer on a condo in Phoenix. This should be exciting, but I'm waiting until I get an answer on my school for next year before I start proclaiming: "Spring break 2010, anyone?"

Real life is sometimes better (and far more bizzare) than fiction

If only the stories I told here were only just stories. Instead, real life is sometimes much more interesting. I'll tell you the exciting-sounding part, then explain it. More and more of it has to do with Twitter, but still, entertaining.

1) I got threatened personally by a tv character:

I watched Krod Mandoon, a new show on Comedy Central. The guy is pretty good looking, but even I, as a straight chick, have to admit that the main chick on that show is smoking. So I tweeted: "Krod Mandoon... even I will admit that chick is utterly hot." I got an @ reply from KrodMandoon: "@ctinalk Aneka is mine!" fml.

2) The return of cockpocket.

Yep, the chick I haven't even met, but will have to eventually; dreamt about her. In the dream, she was mad at me for being passed out on the couch of her boyfriend. I really blew her off. Just like "fuck off, I am hungover. And don't you think that if I had hooked up with him, I'd be in the bed instead of on the couch? You are being irrational." And I haven't even met her. It'll be quite the scene when I actually do, I admit

.

3) Bunnyrabbitsex told me I should write.

I twittered about the dream, just "Had another dream about miss cockpocket. At least my dreams and twitter supply me with an endless supply of entertainment..." "@ctinalk you should write your dreams down and turn them into stories."

4) A cascade of alcohol!!!!

I was deciding whether to get a bottle of wine for myself at Liquor World this afternoon, and a tremendous crash and sounds of glass breaking comes from the back. Bottles of wine and beer were falling down from one of the topmost shelves. It was sad and awkward and entertaining to watch. And hear. Except a mom with a stroller was near ground zero and went off on the guy and stormed out. I felt sad for him. Typical. For me to side 1) with the liquor guy and 2) against mothers.

5) My bed gives new meaning to "the motion of the ocean."

So I think I've mentioned that I have an inflatable for a bed, and since spring break I've been using 2, one on top and one for height. Well... the height one seems to have sprung a larger leak as of late, and towards daylight it's leaving me very precariously perched on the top. I'm going on a hole-hunt tonight. After I finish my con law question

This post is also about shit. For now anyway. I have a few frustrations dealing with bathrooms as of late, and I feel the compelling need to share them.*

So you know the toilets with the sensors that flush the tank when you get up at the end? Every singe one of the toilets at the school has them. And most of them work just fine. except. Except for the possessed ones. The second stall on the 5th floor, and the 1st stall in the library. Evil. They will flush *as you sit down*. As you get *closer* to them they flush. Then periodically as ya pee. Like you sit still and it thinks, "I'm going to piss this stressed off law student just a little bit more. You think you're sitting still...? I see every millimeter of movement, and will flush just to show you I'm paying attention." It's like a bad duvet. Or whatever those things are called. *edit: bidet, that's what they're called.

I also think it's kind of funny how disproportionate some of my notes are to the things we actually talked about in class. Like, there's this one case that we probably talked about for 15 minutes, which is a decent amount of time for Con law, that was about how Iowa used to limit the length of trucks that could travel across the state. So naturally I should be all over it, right? My notes say, an I quote:

"ii.Kassel v. Consolidated 1.Limit lengths of trucks in Iowa."

I'm gonna do *awesome* in Con Law.

*By "share them," I mean, "do anything and everything to get out of studying." This is a last-ditch procrastination attempt.

It's been awhile since I've been called sane, I'll admit

There are many things I should do in the next month, but on the "what I *want* to do" scale, setting myself on fire is somewhere below going on a month-long drinking binge and yet above studying for finals. This might not end well.

Welcome to yet another meandering post. Try to keep up.

I think Facebook has officially taken it too far when I can take a quiz entitled "What kind of librarian are you?" Apparently I'm "Librarian 2.0." Apparently I'm *also* Hitler, according to the "Which world leader are you?" quiz.

Woohoo!!! I really am losing it. I never thought I'd get to the day where I'd say, "Yay, rape!" But you have to remember, this is now a law school brain. In my mind, that thought is succeeded by, "That means I'm getting towards the end of my criminal law outline!" So in this case, rape is a good thing. As twisted as that sounds.

I'm a freaky brat with amazing eyes who ran shirtless with a condom because I have amazing boobs. Hmmm... yeah, this was a little chainletter type thing... ask if you really want to see it. It's pretty entertaining.

Why do I beat myself up over things that the other person probably doesn't even care about!? I can't go back and change it, and it only matters in my mind, so why? It's only distracting me from the studying I should be doing.

OOOHHHH guess what? Guess who's back? It's the amazing fighting couple. Veronica's boyfriend is back, I didn't even know he was over, and already I can hear their voices escalating over my new South Park. And they're fighting. I can't wait for summer.

Best bumper sticker I've seen lately: "Twilight made me cry because I could feel a part of my brain dying."

It's great. I think. Or at least a bit funny. My first cold call of the entire year has come back to give me a horrible nickname. "Douche." As in Hannan v. Dusch. fml. I suppose it's appropriate, my language has been changing to fit it. Lately my usual reaction has been either "sweet," or "mother-fucker!"

Yeah, a lot of this has to do with the final countdown of law school, I'll admit, but really there's only a month left until I will no longer be in Massachusetts!!! No, seriously, on May 15th, at about this time, I assume I'll be somewhere in the western New York/Pennsylvania/Ohio area. I have a lot of studying/outlining/writing/drinking to do before then, but at the end of it all, I get to move in with a couple of great friends, and will be only a few blocks from my summer boys again. Not that I think it will be the same, but to have some continuity after this year will be fantabulous.

I can't wait.

Give me summer, I demand it. NOW!!!!

Huh.

Huh.

I don't know exactly how to start this one. It's kind of like having a crisis of self, but not caring enough to really dig deep and figure it out because it's not that bad, but also knowing that something hit a chord that didn't feel right. I don't know how to explain it, but I'll try to put thoughts down.

Oh, and there'll be a rant at the end. yeah.

So Friday we went to the Tam again for drinks. The weird guy that was there before spring break was there again, just as weird. I had a couple vodka:vodka:cranberries (I had vodka in there twice because the bartender makes them really strong. But after the first one you don't taste the vodka anymore. Lucky me.) and was fine, thanks for asking. Went to Con Law, I think. Yeah. Pretty sure.
But after class I was typing up my notes from the last 3 weeks, and L came in to check in for a break. But as she was leaving she said, "We are shadows of our former selves. We should be drunk right now." And of course I laughed and agreed.
But I got to thinking. Yes, I do like to have the alcohol, and every once in a while I do go overboard, but in general, I feel like I'm reverting to my old self, my introverted, freshman self. Maybe it's good, because that means I don't have the crappy feeling the morning after so it doesn't interrupt my studying, if studying is what I'm doing. But at the same time, I feel like I've come so much further than that. I like who I was last summer, and I want to maintain that. Maybe I just need to get back to Ames.

And that's only like 40 days away! Woohoo!!! Which means finals and such are much closer than I would like to think.
But I'm gearing up. I took a lot of this week off, but I did get some criminal law outlining done. But I took Thursday afternoon off, went shopping and down to Long Wharf. Sigh. The last time I was there, things were much different, both with people and the way I was feeling about Boston. Things change, it just takes time to realize how much they do change.
Then I went to Demetri Martin that night. He is ***gorgeous***. I would have his babies in a second. His hair (yes, I'm a hair girl) is perfect for me, and he's hilarious and can play the piano and guitar... me perfect man. He went to law school too... like me! I'm off to Bo Burnham tonight, looking forward to it, but I'm putting off leaving because it's raining hobos and tramps again.

***

So for the rant. This one pisses me off so much I've even decided to include a diagram. This is a section of the subway to and from school, between a set of doors. It goes: 2 seats, pole, 3 seats, pole, 3 seats, pole, 2 seats. So it would seem like second nature to pick the seats next to the pole to allow a second person to easily sit in the same section, thus allowing more people to ride seated during non-peak hours without majorly intruding into their personal space. Not the case. Some douchebags choose to ride like the guy on the left, as such:



The proper way to situate yourself is like the two loverly people on the right.

I find myself doing a poll in my head, and upwards of 95% of people who do this are either younger/middle-aged guys or foreign. And the guys ALWAYS, ALWAYS splay their legs so wide so it would be impossible to sit next to them without asking them to move their legs. Yes, I know you think you're the man, but what you're doing makes you look like an asshole, and I bet that's why you never get passed second base, I can only assume you have to spread them that wide because you have some horrible STD that requires you to allow your tiny dick and balls access to air at all times, I hope it's syphilis, and I'm sure your mother never loved you as a child. Or now. There is a special circle of hell reserved for people like you.

Just because I kiss the prettiest boys and I drive Monty too fast...

Why does everybody want to kick my ass?
Yes, yes I did in fact just ad lib to Big and Rich.

I cannot wait for the day when I can legitimately RT this post: It's Monday. A day where I probably won't leave my house.

I'm slightly confused. This entire week was supposed to be rain, rain, rain. But it's been pretty gorgeous most days. Except for Monday. It was raining hobos and tramps (it rains hobos and tramps in Massachusetts instead of cats and dogs, for those of you wondering). But I guess I get to go shopping today, I've got loads of time to kill before I have to walk the 300 feet down to the Wilbur Theatre to see my future husband (future ex-husband?) Demetri Martin perform.

I seem to be having the *best* luck lately. No, seriously, other than the stress of classes which is kinda making me shut down, everything seems to be going right.

Shall I start?

Well, I sent an email out... Tuesday, I think it was, to the Ames City, Story County and Boone County attorneys, trying to put feelers out to figure out if internships at any of those places would be feasible. Guess what? Later that day, get an email from the Ames guy, saying I'd probably be able to work there part time during the summer!! Now I still want the job with Iowa Concern, but they don't decide that until May, so I kind of need to figure out a way to stall. I'm good at procrastinating though, it shouldn't be a problem.

Then, my random trolling of the internet paid off Tuesday night, when I stayed logged on to Bo Burnhams live blog site. Apparently, while I was off folding laundry or doing some prelim packing, he showed up for about 15 seconds and gave all of us on there permanent operator status. For those of you who don't get it, blogtv only allows 150 people in the main room to chat directly with the blogger at a time. Now, thanks to perma-ops, I get automatic main room! It's really a cool celebrity run-in for me.

Then, Wednesday morning, I roll out of bed, get online, register for classes at New England (because I'm not guaranteed that I'll be able to transfer back), then climb back into bed. It was wonderful, easy, a little bit more awkward and slower than ISU (but what do you expect? I'd hope a leading technology school would have a perfected online registration system, so I've been completely and utterly spoiled both by the system and the fact that I always got to register early because I was head and shoulders above everyone else in my "class" in terms of credit numbers, so I was registering with the seniors in the spring of my sophomore year or something crazy like that), but I got all the classes I wanted. I figured most others did as well. hahahahahahha nope. Apparently lots of people got NONE of the classes they wanted, some didn't even get into the REQUIRED class.
Ok, let me emphasize. This is a class we are REQUIRED to take next fall, and the school didn't have enough seats open. Utterly ridiculous.
Oh, and my process took all of about 8 minutes. 8:08, back in bed. Some people's took upwards of an HOUR. I'd be super pissed.

But, I'm counting my lucky ducks only after they hatch. But this week has been pretty great. Easy, tiring, but easy. I've been taking it easy on purpose too, because the bum rush of finals shall be upon me soon enough. So I've got Demetri Martin Thursday and Bo Burnham on Saturday, which I actually have a date for. legit. But I'm leaving. He knows. Whatevs. Not making that mistake again.

I wanna go hooommmmeeeee. Home to Ames. 40 days til Ames. Or some ridiculously small number like that.

Varnum v. Brien: my summary

So, in an effort to make sure I know the case, I’m going to spend my Friday night (which turned into Saturday and Sunday afternoons) perusing Varnum v. Brien and setting out what I would state the summary to be.

(A note before you begin, this ended up being 9 and a half pages in word. That's a lot longer than I thought it was going to be, but I still think it’s good. This is not meant to be a legal analysis, by any means, and is simply meant to put the ruling into a more concise and focused format. But I by no means think it was a poorly written opinion. On the contrary, I think it is pure poetry, (indeed, as you'll see, I started out not wanting to quote a lot, but many times the court said it better than I ever could, hence the reason they're the Supremes) whether you agree with the ruling or not. I also hope I’ve presented it in as balanced a voice as possible, even with my comments inserted.)

If you're not a law student and want a toned-down version, just ask.

So enjoy, comment, and if you want to repost, just ask permission.

Some background to begin with: I was too young and naïve to remember or care when this whole thing started back in 1998, but the legislature passed the Defense of Marriage act, which added to state code that “only a marriage between a male and a female is valid.” In time, six same-sex couples who were denied marriage licenses by the Polk County Recorder’s office brought this suit against the Polk County Recorder. (Des Moines, state capital of Iowa, is located in Polk County) The couples brought the suit in the form of a summary judgment motion, using many arguments which the court addresses in its opinion, and the Polk County District Court concluded the statute was unconstitutional under the due process and equal protection clauses in the Iowa Constitution.

What resulted was an uproar, in the fall of my senior year at Iowa State, in late October 2007. For something less than 27 hours, gay marriage was allowed in Iowa. Because of the large amount of paperwork required to obtain a marriage license, only one couple was legally married in that limited amount of time, Sean Fritz and Timothy McQuillan, two students also at Iowa State at the time. (The article which followed this event in the student newspaper can be found here. An interesting quote from the article: “"The voters [need to decide] if they want Iowa to become the Massachusetts of the Midwest," McDowell said.”)

But the day after the ruling from the District Court handed down this ruling and ordered the recorder’s office to start processing same-sex marriage licenses, it stayed the order, pending the appeals process to the Iowa Supreme Court.
So comes this case. In the case, per our LRW classes, the court uses a basic outline form, which I shall follow.

II. Standard of Review
Pretty basic, the court will review the facts of the case under a summary judgment standard.

III. Constitutional Separation of Powers
The court goes into a declaration stating the Constitution is the upmost law of the state and when individuals seek an upholding of their rights, the separation of powers must be strictly observed. The constitution also creates certain rights, of which equal protection and due process are two, which the government cannot infringe upon.
At this point I have to point out that either the Supreme Court has been writing excellent opinions that I fail to read, or Justice Cady knew this opinion would have a nationwide and varied population reading Varnum, because he goes to great lengths to explain the history, notion, and process of the 3-tiered system of government. It also seems to know the outcome of this case may be unpopular to some, but must be decided this way, because it points out that “[a] statute inconsistent with the Iowa Constitution must be declared void, even though it may be supported by strong and deep-seated traditional beliefs and popular opinion,” (pg 13) and the point of the courts is to “to withdraw certain subjects from the vicissitudes of political controversy, to place them beyond the reach of majorities and officials and to establish them as legal principles to be applied by the courts” (pg 14), and “[j]udges ought not to be partisans, and be influenced by partisan control. Their duty is to interpret and apply the law, to the end that the liberty, and the rights and property, of the people may be secured.” (pg 14)

IV. Equal Protection.

A. Background Principles
In both the separation of powers and this section the court recognized that the standards of the public changes as time progresses, so the fabric of society must be decided in the context of each generation, not sticking to outdated social norms. They use the progression of cases, such as race, where discrimination was once an accepted practice, but society has since seen that it is inherently contrary to the notion of equal protection.
In my favorite part of the opinion, the court goes into the history of cases in Iowa, and how progressive the state had been. A few examples include it struck down denying slaves equal protection and prohibiting women from being admitted to the bar, ironically, in both cases, prior to the US Supreme court upheld laws allowing these practices. It also “struck blows” at segregation as early as 1868, long before the US Supreme Court decided the Brown cases.

B. Legal Tests to Gauge Equal Protection
According to the court, in quoting precedent in Iowa, the equal protection clause in the Iowa Constitution is similar to that of the US Constitution in that it ‘is essentially a direction that all persons similarly situated should be treated alike.’ (pg 19) But in looking at the actions of the legislative branch of government, in keeping with the separation of powers, the judiciary “must give respect to the legislative process and presume its enactments are constitutional.” (pg 19-20) But the level of deference paid to the legislature is determined by the level of scrutiny used to determine equal protection cases.
Cady then goes into a very explicit explanation of the levels of scrutiny. When I said that I learned more about equal protection and levels of scrutiny from Varnum than from a semester of Con Law, this is where it started.
Under the rational basis test, the courts are highly deferential to the legislature, and it requires “only a plausible policy justification, mere rationality of the facts underlying the decision and, again, a merely rational relationship between the classification and the policy justification.” (pg 21)
However, “courts apply a heightened level of scrutiny under equal protection analysis when reasons exist to suspect “prejudice against discrete and insular minorities . . . which tends seriously to curtail the operation of those political processes ordinarily to be relied upon to protect minorities.” (pg 21-22, citing Carolene Prods.) “Under this approach, classifications based on race, alienage, or national origin and those affecting fundamental rights are evaluated according to a standard known as “strict scrutiny.” Classifications subject to strict scrutiny are presumptively invalid and must be narrowly tailored to serve a compelling governmental interest.” (pg 22, citations omitted)

[NESL classmates: I should note, however, in contrast to what Prof Garza was saying on Friday, Cady specifically says in note 8 on page 22 that “References to “heightened” scrutiny in this opinion are meant to be general; heightened scrutiny includes any judicial inquiry more searching than the rational basis test. References to “intermediate” scrutiny discuss a specific level of scrutiny between the rational basis test and strict scrutiny.” As I will point out later, the court specifically uses intermediate scrutiny to determine this case, they don’t try to create some vague new level located somewhere between intermediate and strict.]

The intermediate tier has been “applied to statutes classifying on the basis of gender or illegitimacy and requires the party seeking to uphold the statute to demonstrate the challenged classification is substantially related to the achievement of an important governmental objective. … To survive intermediate scrutiny, the law must not only further an important governmental interest and be substantially related to that interest, but the justification for the classification must be genuine and must not depend on broad generalizations.” (pg 22)

C. Determination of Constitutional Facts
I’ll admit, this section is one which I made no effort to understand the first time around, and I’m not sure it makes much difference in the grand scheme of things. But, it appears to me that because of the status of some of the testimony, the district court excluded it, and the County brings it up in this appeal.
Adjudicative facts, it seems, are the facts specific to a particular case and the outcome of the case hinges simply on applying existing rules to the facts presented. Legislative (or constitutional) facts, on the other hand, are facts about society as a whole and the idea leads to adapting laws or rulings on laws based on societal trends, and while there are set rules regulating the admission and presentation, of adjudicative facts, legislative facts can be presented either formally or informally, and can in fact be judge-obtained. The court looks at the “actual truth content” of the legislative facts, and should rely only on the most compelling data. However, the court says the error of the trial court in dis-allowing such evidence is not relevant in its current de-novo review.

D. Similarly Situated People
The County advanced the argument that the plaintiffs were not “similarly” situated to heterosexuals because they could not “procreate naturally” (pg 26) and therefore the laws did not have to be applied uniformly to them, banking on the assertion that equal protection demands that laws treat alike all people who are “‘similarly situated with respect to the legitimate purposes of the law.’” (pg 25) But, the court declares, “‘[S]imilarly situated’ cannot mean simply ‘similar in the possession of the classifying trait.’” In other words, “No two people or groups of people are the same in every way, and nearly every equal protection claim could be run aground onto the shoals of a threshold analysis if the two groups needed to be a mirror image of one another.” (pg 27) So “to truly ensure equality before the law, the equal protection guarantee requires that laws treat all those who are similarly situated with respect to the purposes of the law alike.” (27) The court explains the history of marriage laws in the state, saying that they were to allow individuals in a relationship to combine their financial resources and efforts and energies together. They also serve to “recognize the status of the parties’ committed relationship,” (28) and to change their legal and social status.
The plaintiffs are similarly situated to heterosexual couples, according to the court, because the purpose of the laws was to promote committed relationships and to provide “an institutional basis for defining their fundamental relational rights and responsibilities.” (28)

E. Classification Undertaken in Iowa Code Section 595.2
This section determines whether the statute limiting marriage to one between a man and a woman is classification on the basis of gender or sexual orientation. The district court held it was classification on gender, but the Supreme Court hold it classifies on basis of sexual orientation. “The benefit denied by the marriage statute—the status of civil marriage for same-sex couples—is so “closely correlated with being homosexual” as to make it apparent the law is targeted at gay and lesbian people as a class.”” By requiring that the person you are marrying be of the opposite gender, “purposefully placing civil marriage outside the realistic reach of gay and lesbian individuals”, the statute effectively discriminates on the basis of sexual orientation, not gender.(31)

F. Framework for Determining Appropriate Level of Judicial Scrutiny
Obviously, neither the Iowa or the Supreme Court has determined the level of scrutiny appropriate for a sexual orientation classification, however past cases can provide a way to determine the proper level.
“Classifications based on factors like race, alienage, national origin, sex, or illegitimacy are “so seldom relevant to achievement of any legitimate state interest that laws grounded in such considerations are deemed to reflect prejudice and antipathy…” “For these reasons and because such discrimination is unlikely to be soon rectified by legislative means,” laws based on these types of classifications must withstand more intense judicial scrutiny than other types of classifications. ” (33)
But to determine the levels in other cases, the Supreme Court has looked at four factors: “(1) the history of invidious discrimination against the class burdened by the legislation; (2) whether the characteristics that distinguish the class indicate a typical class member’s ability to contribute to society; (3) whether the distinguishing characteristic is “immutable” or beyond the class members’ control; and (4) the political power of the subject class.” (34-35) This is not a solid test, and the court assesses “how each bears on the question of whether the Iowa Constitution requires a more searching scrutiny be applied to the specific classification at issue.” (36) They do conclude that the first two factors have always been present when heightened scrutiny is applied and are considered pre-requisites. The final two are looked at to supplement the determination for heightened scrutiny

G. Determination of Appropriate Level of Scrutiny

1. History of discrimination against gay and lesbian people
The county does not argue that gays and lesbians have been targets of “purposeful and invidious discrimination” (37) because of their sexual orientation, and the court points to several instances of discrimination throughout and up to recent history, such as gays being dismissed from the military, hate crimes, and others. The state legislature has felt the need to remedy these and other past wrongs by including the definition of hate crimes to include those committed against an individual or group because of their sexual orientation and prohibit bullying or harassment in schools based on sexual orientation. These enactments “demonstrate a legislative recognition of the need to remedy historical sexual-orientation based discrimination.” (38)
“In sum, this history of discrimination suggests any legislative burdens placed on lesbian and gay people as a class “are more likely than others to reflect deep-seated prejudice rather than legislative rationality in pursuit of some legitimate objective.” This observation favors an elevated scrutiny to uncover any such prejudice.” (38-39, citations omitted)

2. Sexual orientation and the ability to contribute to society
First off, the court asserts that when the classification bears no relationship to a person’s ability to contribute to society, heightened scrutiny should be applied. A classification without that relationship is presumed to be based on prejudice and outmoded notions of society. (39) “More importantly, the Iowa legislature has recently declared as the public policy of this state that sexual orientation” has been “recognized in Iowa to be irrelevant to a person’s ability to contribute to society.” (pg 39-40, citing chpt 216 of the Iowa Code)

3. Immutability of sexual orientation
The County advanced this argument fiercely because they contest that the plaintiffs could not prove that sexuality was immutable. “A human trait that defines a group is “immutable” when the trait exists “solely by the accident of birth.”” (42) “Put another way, when a characteristic is immutable, different treatment based on this characteristic seems “all the more invidious and unfair.”” The Iowa Supreme Court said that the courts do not require the class to prove that the trait is absolutely impossible to change. Instead, they say the “immutability “prong of the suspectness inquiry surely is satisfied when . . . the identifying trait is ‘so central to a person’s identity that it would be abhorrent for government to penalize a person for refusing to change [it].’ ”” (44) The court here said that because the orientation “‘may be altered [if at all] only at the expense of significant damage to the individual’s sense of self,’” (44) sexual orientation can properly be deemed an immutable characteristic.

4. Political powerlessness of lesbian and gay people
The County tried to assert this prong of the test was not present because of the numerous legal protections the gay and lesbian people have secured for themselves against discrimination and argues that the group must have nearly a complete lack of political power before the courts elevate the level of scrutiny. However, the court says that complete lack of political power is not a pre-requisite for protection, citing the case that women had some political power when scrutiny was heightened for gender classifications, and the current political power is also not a pre-requisite for judicial protection, as then courts would unlikely be able heightened scrutiny on any current suspect classifications.
Rather, Cady cites, “the touchstone of the analysis should be “whether the group lacks sufficient political strength to bring a prompt end to the prejudice and discrimination through traditional political means.”” (46-47) And, “although equal rights for gays and lesbians have been increasingly recognized in the political arena, the right to civil marriage is a notable exception to this trend. Consequently, the specific right sought in this case has largely lacked any extensive political support and has actually experienced an affirmative backlash.” So it’s concluded that gays and lesbians as a class are no more politically powerful than other groups currently protected and this prong should not count against them in the current test.

5. Classifications based on sexual orientation demand closer scrutiny
In citing the Connecticut case of Kerrington, the court says, “Nonetheless, we conclude that, as a minority group that continues to suffer the enduring effects of centuries of legally sanctioned discrimination, laws singling them out for disparate treatment are subject to heightened judicial scrutiny to ensure that those laws are not the product of such historical prejudice and stereotyping.” (48-49) Therefore, classifications based on sexual orientation must be examined under a heightened level of scrutiny under the Iowa constitution

H. Application of Heightened Scrutiny
Although the Plaintiffs argue for the case to be subjected to the “most searching scrutiny,” the court holds that because the statute cannot survive intermediate scrutiny, the court does not need to and does not determine whether classification on sexual orientation should be subject to strict scrutiny. (49)

1. Intermediate scrutiny standard
As we should have learned from Con Law, (whether we actually have or not is questionable, I realize) ““To withstand intermediate scrutiny, a statutory classification must be substantially related to an important governmental objective.” In applying an intermediate standard to review gender-based classifications, the Supreme Court has stated: “Focusing on the differential treatment or denial of opportunity for which relief is sought, the reviewing court must determine whether the proffered justification is ‘exceedingly persuasive.’ ” …whether the proffered governmental objectives are important and whether the statutory classification is “‘substantially related to the achievement of those objectives.’ ”” (50, citations omitted)

2. Statutory classification: exclusion of gay and lesbian people from civil marriage.
“To identify the statutory classification, [the court must] focus on the “differential treatment or denial of opportunity for which relief is sought.” “Because the relevant focal point is the opportunity sought by the plaintiffs, the issue presented by this lawsuit is whether the state has “exceedingly persuasive” reasons for denying civil marriage to same-sex couples, not whether state sanctioned, heterosexual marriage is constitutional. Thus, the question we must answer is whether excluding gay and lesbian people from civil marriage is substantially related to any important governmental objective.” (51, citations omitted)

3. Governmental objectives
Here the court must determine whether the objectives offered by the County can be deemed important. If they are sufficiently weighty to be deemed important, the next question is whether the objective is fairly advanced by the classification. The five sections following are the County’s main arguments for the classification.

a. Maintaining traditional marriage
The court starts right off by saying this objective has “superficial” appeal. However, “[w]hen a certain tradition is used as both the governmental objective and the classification to further that objective,” the argument becomes circular in that it becomes a question of “whether the classification accomplishes the governmental objective, which objective is to maintain the classification.” (52) After a slightly confusing though explanatory example of this, the court says that in that approach it allows a classification to be maintained for its own sake. It also says that this is not a governmental interest being asserted, just a preservation of tradition argument.

b. Promotion of optimal environment to raise children
With both sides offering up support for their arguments that either “the interests of children are served equally by same-sex parents and opposite-sex parents” or that opposite-sex households are the optimal environment for children, and even though the court admits that the “best interests of the child” is a legitimate governmental interest which the statute may reasonably advance that interest, in this case intermediate scrutiny is used, and under that analysis the government’s goal must be substantial. The court then asks whether the classification is over- or under- inclusive.
“An under-inclusive statute means all people included in the statutory classification have the trait that is relevant to the aim of the statute, but other people with the trait are not included in the classification.…. An over-inclusive statute “imposes a burden upon a wider range of individuals than are included in the class of those” with the trait relevant to the aim of the law.”(55, only 15 more pages left!)
The statute is under-inclusive because it does not include others who would also provide a less-than-optimal parents, such as “child abusers, sexual predators, parents neglecting to provide child support, and violent felons” (56) and thus tends to show that the classification is based in prejudice or overbroad generalizations. “If the marriage statute was truly focused on optimal parenting, many classifications of people would be excluded, not merely gay and lesbian people.” (56) The statute in fact also does not prohibit unmarried same-sex couples from raising children. The court does entertain the notion that this statute is a step towards providing the optimal environment for children, with other remedies to follow, however it ultimately dismisses it as well.
The statute is also over-inclusive because it includes those same-sex couples who do not wish to and will not choose to raise children.
A statute which is at the same time both over- and under-broad statute reveals it is “less about using marriage to achieve an optimal environment for children and more about merely precluding gay and lesbian people from civil marriage,” (58) and therefore only minimally advances the government’s asserted interest, not clearing the hurdle of intermediate scrutiny.

c. Promotion of procreation
The court dismisses this claim quite quickly, mainly because the County failed to answer the question required under the analysis: “whether exclusion of gay and lesbian individuals from the institution of civil marriage will result in more procreation.” (59) While heterosexual marriage does indeed lead to procreation, the County failed to show that with same-sex marriage prohibited, opposite-sex couples would be more likely to have children. (As a chick who doesn’t want kids herself, I have to whole-heartedly agree with this analysis. It’s really quite ridiculous)

d. Promoting stability in opposite-sex relationships
Apparently the County didn’t even provide evidence to support this objective, and the court could find no relationship either. “The stability of opposite-sex relationships is an important governmental interest, but the exclusion of same-sex couples from marriage is not substantially related to that objective.” (60)

e. Conservation of resources
The County’s argument is simple: “couples who are married enjoy numerous governmental benefits, so the state’s fiscal burden associated with civil marriage is reduced if less people are allowed to marry.” (60) However, under this argument, any group of people (African-Americans, illegitimates, aliens, even red-haired individuals) could be restricted from marrying in an equally rational way. (61)
The statute is also shown to be once again over- and under-inclusive with regards to this particular objective (see page 62) and the court holds it does not substantially further this objective.

4. Conclusion
“[T]he sexual-orientation-based classification under the marriage statute does not substantially further any of the objectives.” (63)

I. Religious Opposition to Same-Sex Marriage
The County does not advance this argument (the court rationalizes this silence saying it believes the County understands religion cannot be used to justify a ban on same-sex marriage), though the court brings it up as an argument on its own.
The court recognizes that much of the opposition to same-sex marriage comes from religious groups, seeking to preserve the sanctity and tradition of marriage. Because the Constitution does not permit any branch of government to resolve religious debates, lawyers, judges and courts have specifically avoided making these arguments. This aside, however, the court seeks to calm those opposed to same-sex marriage by asserting that this permitting of civil same-sex marriage does not require a church to change their doctrine. “A religious denomination can still define marriage as a union between a man and a woman, and a marriage ceremony performed by a minister, priest, rabbi, or other person ordained or designated as a leader of the person’s religious faith does not lose its meaning as a sacrament or other religious institution.”(66)

J. Constitutional Infirmity
There are no genuine facts which can support the upholding of the statute under the equal protection clause of the Iowa Constitution.

V. Remedy
“[T]he language in Iowa Code section 595.2 limiting civil marriage to a man and a woman must be stricken from the statute, and the remaining statutory language must be interpreted and applied in a manner allowing gay and lesbian people full access to the institution of civil marriage.” (68)

VI. Conclusion
“The district court properly granted summary judgment to plaintiffs. Iowa Code section 595.2 violates the equal protection provision of the Iowa Constitution. [The] decision becomes effective upon issuance of procedendo.” (69) (“[p]rocedendo shall issue twenty-one days after the opinion is filed unless a petition for rehearing is filed”)

Phew! On to my crim law outline!
~C